Susie G.

My parents separated when I was a year and a half old. I have no recollection of my mother and father being together. It makes me sad to think that this is the experience that Janey and Parker will have. Although, I will be honest and say that I NEVER had thoughts, wishes, or hopes that my parents would "get back together" at any point in my life. Them apart was just the way things were.

My Dad had a long time, on and off, girlfriend over the years. Her name was Susie. We met her many times, but mostly, they were pen pals. Susie eventually moved to Wisconsin and would write my Dad letters on beautiful stationary, in beautiful calligraphy. (Interesting to note that my Stepmom is a very talented artist and calligrapher.) I can remember one time where we flew with my Dad to Wisconsin to visit Susie. I can't remember much about the trip, except for a strange interaction with some "Wisconsiners" at a nearby playground. Whatever.

I'm not sure how old I was (probably somewhere around 9 or 10) but I remember having a discussion with my Dad about shaving my legs. I have no idea what preceded the discussion, and I only remember what I took out of it. My Dad explained to me that his "friend" Susie only shaved her legs up to the knee. He told me that he really liked it, and felt her never shaving above the knee was really special because her thighs was always super soft and smooth. I always remembered those comments, and (although I had some bikini wearing days in my twenties where I shaved my thighs too) to this day, I only shave my legs to the knee. Partly, this is merely a decision of convenience, but I am grateful for the early suggestion planted in my mind by my father.

I tell this (very strange) story for a couple of reasons. First, to me, it illustrates the power that our words can have in our children's lives. I doubt my Dad would remember that conversation without some reminding. It was frivolous. However, I have carried that information with me a long way. You could say that it affected my life profoundly. We are always affecting our children with the things we say, the things we do, the expectations we have, the examples we set. I can think of another situation where my Dad was overly honest with me (not obscene, but not pleasant either) and I think that it is from him I learned to tell the truth no matter what. Even if it is going to embarrass me or hurt someone's feelings, it is more important to tell the whole truth. I think that the truth I have expressed in this blog is what has touched people's hearts and helped them to feel the Spirit. The Spirit will always testify of the Truth.

Another way I have related this story to my life is that when I told Chris (my "affair") that I didn't shave above the knee, he was shocked and amazed. If you were to feel my thigh, you would not be able to tell that there is hair there. He (Chris) made such a big deal about it. It was as though this was something special about ME. I guess, in a way, I felt like the Susie my Dad had described to me. I didn't feel that way in my marriage for many reasons - some of which were my own creation - but I didn't feel that way.