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--- On Wed, 5/18/11, Carolyn Taylor <carolyn> wrote:

From: Carolyn Taylor
Subject: Me
To: "Rick J Thomson"
Date: Wednesday, May 18, 2011, 4:09 PM

I know that I have a tendency to hang on to things or to not be able to get over things as fast as you do and for that I apologize. I just have to say a few things, most of which you have heard before, but I think it will help the situation. I first have to say that I am truly sorry for my reaction to your messages. You are a grown man who is fully capable of writing a message without if being proofed by me. I trust your judgement and abilities in every way but for whatever reason when it comes to her I just feel like she weaves such a trap and I freak out if I think you wrote something that her messed up mind can twist or manipulate. I am sorry for letting these things get to me over and over. I do not doubt your love for me or our commitment to each other I just have always had a problem with her constantly trying to get you back or change your mind. I have had to put up with it since I got here. The emails, the texts, messages she has the children deliver, the lunchbox, the ring etc. All these things even though you have ignored and repeatedly shut her down it still bothers me that she thinks she can do it. I also struggle with the whole "I am still your wife" comments and all of her other bs. I try so hard to not let it in but it hurts me and then out of my hurt I hurt you and us. I know 100% that after this is all done I will not allow these things to hurt me the way they do now. I know we will still have to deal with her but our situation and my "place" will be different. I never question my commitment to you or to the life we are trying to build and if I make you feel that way I am sorry. 

I am grateful for all your hard work and sacrifices that you make for me and for all of us. I love the determination and the drive you have when it comes to proargin-9 and the desire to build a successful company so we can all be together. I love that your mind is constantly trying to find ways to better our lives and our situation and that you do always, even when I don't recognize it, think of me. I love you with all my heart. I can't wait for the next chapter to start and I can't believe how close it is. I promise I will work to fix the problems I have and the problems I create for us. I love you and I thank you for your patience, understanding and ability to tolerate my b.s.